Days Three, Four, and Five:
Things continue to be not as awesome as I’d want. Saturday I was totally sick and felt awful. Sunday was a lot better, and I went to work and all that jazz~ Monday, day five, was just as bad as Saturday.
And let me be brutally honest. Frequently, when I hurt a lot physically, when my body just seems to totally fail me, I just curl up emotionally. I don’t leave my room, I don’t answer my phone, I don’t communicate at all. Sometimes, it is because I’m afraid that I’m not good enough to associate with others, and my body is telling me so. Additionally, I’m also tired of making the extra effort. I have to work extra just to find myself something to eat. So when I have to make the additionally extra effort to meet a friend or find a way to get along.
I know it’s stupid to want the world to revolve around me, and I know that it can’t and won’t, and it’s for the best that it doesn’t. But the occasional leeway would be nice. I still want to make the effort and not have these problems, but I have them. And they wear me out.
Being worn out isn’t going to help me get better one bit.
Man sorry for the vent. Day six will be a better post, I promise.